And not just plus size women, men as well. We're getting into how plus women and more specifically plus black women, are perceived in the eyes of social media and discussing how that can hinder our whole mission of inclusivity.

The creation of social media has become a blessing and a curse. In all reality, it has become the leading cause of no one being able to mind their business and allows bigotry and ignorance to spew by people providing unwanted opinions at people they don’t even personally know and have never seen in real life. Despite these issues, it has also become one of the most helpful forms of exposure and financial revenue that we’ve seen to date. I mean Instagram models, Youtubers, Twitter gurus, there is something for everyone in the land of social media. I wanted to talk about a topic today that isn’t talked about enough for me and that’s the relationship social media has when it comes to the plus-size community, for men and women. 

When I think about the relationship and the impact social media has on the plus community as a whole, I think about the positives and how our bodies are now more socially accepted but I also think about how brands along with social media have programmed plus-size women to essentially dislike themselves to put it plainly. Although plus representation is appreciated and amazing to see, the repeated use of models on the smaller end of the plus-size scale has women somewhat shook when they see a woman that looks like them come down their timeline. Big stomachs, thighs, hips, breasts, arms, and faces are a rarity and the sooner we normalize the use of all body types whether it be on social media or just advertising in general, the sooner we can tackle the subject of acceptance and move the hell on with our lives! 🙂

It may be hard to believe y’all, but we can find joy online by minding the business that pays us.  If there is nothing nice to say, then don’t say anything at all. Didn’t y’all parents teach you that? Or your granny? Like come on! At what point did our sense fly out the window that we think we can just talk to anyone any type of way?? It’s getting ridiculous and that brings me to another thought I had while I was planning this topic to talk about with y’all…The war or debate between plus-size women & “curvy” women. Let’s talk about it because social media plays a huge part in the perception and how a woman’s body type is defined. I see comments all the time under plus women’s pictures of people calling her “thick” and some hating ass person comes along and says “that ain’t thick that’s fat or that’s obese” honestly shut the f*** up. I am so serious, like that gets on my nerves. Yall know exactly what I’m talking about too! Let’s keep it a stack, a thou, a billiwow💰, like let’s get honest. We live in a world where the media and industry still treats plus size as an anomaly- poking at it because it looks cool, but afraid to be the first one to embrace it out of fear of acceptance from their peers. Recently, I’ve seen a good handful of influencers portraying certain types of curves as being sexier than others. We consistently see pictures of curvy women with small waists and large hips being presented as “plus-size perfection.” And my thing is, I don’t want women who don’t have an hourglass figure to feel any less beautiful. It’s almost like the plus-size positivity movement is edging away from including all plus-size women in favor of celebrating only a certain kind of curvy woman and it pisses me off. 

We need to stick together because we’re stronger as one. All bodies are different, and all bodies deserve to be celebrated. I’ve preached this time and time again! I think what upsets me the most is that some people do not consider plus-size and curvy the same thing, now granted I understand why people view them as different but realistically, curvy is a sub-category for being plus size. I’m simply disputing the people who believe that one is more desirable than the other. When thinking of the term “curvy” and what it means to a woman, the common misconception is that a curvy woman may (emphasis on MAY) have an hourglass figure, so the thin waist, big booty, and in many cases nice-sized breasts. Now stay with me, A curvy woman is not always overweight, right? It just depends on who is using the term, because many plus-size women prefer to use this term to describe themselves and people tend to snatch it away and replace it with words with a more negative connotation like fat or big, even if they don’t have that specific figure. So don’t let the first definition throw you off. The definition of plus-size really depends on who you ask. Some people say it’s sizes 6 or 8 and up (crazy, right?) or 12 or 14 and up, depending on where you live & just how you perceive people. But Its true definition describes above-average clothing sizes, NOT a female body type, it really has nothing to do with it but again, a term that society latched onto. 

Some people believe plus-size women are not as desirable as curvy women. So my question is, can the curvy designation be considered a new fad? Now let’s get into some truth for a sec, a lot of curvy women disassociate themselves from the plus-size movement. It’s common. Some curvy women love all this newfound attention but are offended by being called plus-size because they believe it to have negative connotations. There are lots of types of bigger-bodied women, and one type should not be seen as more desirable than the other. The main contribution to the curvy-craze are women who have procedures done such as Liposuction or a BBL. I am not knocking that decision or body modification AT ALL, let me be abundantly clear. Please do whatever you feel comfortable doing to your body because it is indeed YOUR body. I’m just addressing the subject at hand that women of all races and ethnicities are paying surgeons to get curvy hips, fat asses, and big breasts that are way larger than what they normally would carry, so they help to contribute to the newfound issue of how curvy women are being defined. In short, Natural bodies have become out of the norm, and they’re essentially going extinct. And I mean it’s unfortunate, but it’s true!

I’m not sure how we got to this point because back in the day, nobody wanted a big butt, but times are changing & shit is evolving! Now, another point I wanted to make is the fact that social media has created a really comfortable situation for internet trolls and keyboard crazies who just got the balls to talk down to people behind a screen and never to their face. For example, if you look at an IG model’s comments section vs. say… In Lizzo’s comment section, you’ll find a plethora of positive comments, but the difference between the 2 is although the IG model might get talked a little shit about, her body is mostly seen as socially acceptable and aesthetically pleasing, while Lizzo on the other hand gets comments about her weight, accusations about her health, her cellulite, her shape, her clothes, essentially just being completely picked apart. Not saying this doesn’t happen to everyone, but I mean come on baby let’s be realistic, it is a shit show in a fat woman’s comments. Lizzo has never called herself curvy. She is considered plus-size. She’s amazing, beautiful, and talented! and she’s worthy and valuable just like everybody else, but instead, because she shows more of herself just like she would if she was thinner, it doesn’t sit right with y’all? Cry me a freakin river honestly! She’s confident and secure within herself AND she knows what pisses y’all off and gets people all riled up! Y’all fall for it every time! But I digress. Plus-size women still have to fight to be seen as valuable, desirable, and fashionable. And actually, Thank God for the soaring popularity of Lizzo! She really out here doing the damn thang! Periodt. 

Okay, y’all to wrap this up. My final discussion point would be the question, what can you do to resolve this? What can we do as a society to resolve this issue of hate toward plus people & BLACK plus people at that? Here’s what I think will help... It’s quite simple. Mind your business and live your life. Don’t contribute to stepping on your plus-size sisters & husky brothers to lift yourself up. Don’t let social media define your greatness and determine the greatness of others. Be the best version of yourself that you can be. Basically, don’t believe the hype. The real tea is, probably about 98 percent of the media images we see — the standards to which we hold our body’s worth — are airbrushed and transformed by the time we see them. So relax. Lead with love and acceptance, be kinder to yourself, and As the famous saying goes, “Be the example you want to see in the world.” Okay?

I love y’all! Have a blessed one. 🤍